HUMOROUS AND MISCELLANEOUS BUMPER STICKERS
Looking for something funny? Maybe sarcastic? Perhaps a bit on the smart ass side? Or maybe you want to proclaim your love of chocolate or coffee in a humorous way, or talk about your favorite sport. Well, you may find what you're looking for right here!

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Mornings give daytime a bad name Not a morning person? Believe me, I understand! Let this humorous, anti-morning item express your feelings for you about that most miserable time of the day: Mornings give daytime a bad name.	On the first day, God made coffee... If you're really into coffee, and/or if your day just can't get started without it, let this express your feelings: "On the first day, God made coffee...and the rest was easy."	Hand over the coffee and no one gets hurt! For die-hard coffee lovers in need of their cup of coffee, things can get a little hairy! This humorous, pro-coffee item says it well: Hand over the coffee and no one gets hurt!	A balanced diet is chocolate in both hands Calling all chocoholics! Is this your idea of a balanced diet: Chocolate in both hands? If so, you're a true chocolate lover! Let people know what your idea of a balanced diet is!
The opposite sex confuses me. Chocolate... Does the opposite sex confuse you...yet you have no problem understanding chocolate? Then you may be a true chocoholic! And you can let the world know with this chocolate-lovers' design.	On the first day, God created chocolate... Are you a true chocoholic? If so, this may be just the thing for you: On the first day, God created chocolate...and the rest was easy. Enough said!	I work hard so millions on welfare don't have to If you've had it with working your ass off so that multi-generational families of welfare recipients can continue having a free ride, speak up! "I work hard so millions on welfare don't have to"	Tomorrow...I'm going to quit procrastinating Is this your motto: "Tomorrow...I'm going to quit procrastinating"? Do you always delay things until the last possible moment? Well, tell the world!
My reality check bounced This is a clever take on the "reality check" idea, "My reality check bounced."	Opinions are like assholes... Isn't this the truth?! "Opinions are like assholes. Everybody has one, but nobody wants to see the other guy's." If you're looking for a smart ass design...this may be just the thing!	I found Jesus! (He was hiding...) Okay, okay, we're not knocking religion with this...we're just having a little fun. "I found Jesus! He was hiding behind the sofa the whole time"	I'm not bald. I'm a solar-panelled sex machine! Just because you're bald--or a loved one is--doesn't mean you're dead downstairs! Let folks know that you're not bald, you're a solar-panelled sex machine.
Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the mo Does this describe you, or maybe someone you know? Perhaps you're a little, um, scatterbrained? Don't be bashful! Go ahead and say it: "Of all the things I've lost...I miss my mind the most."	I have PMS and ESP, which makes me a bitch who... Have some fun with a little PMS humor! If you have PMS and ESP, you're a bitch who knows everything--so go ahead and say it! "I have PMS and ESP, which makes me a bitch who knows everything!"	I'd rather be surfing Are you California dreaming? Do you love to surf? Or maybe you always wanted to be a surfer but haven't learned yet? Express your love for surfing with this design: "I'd rather be surfing"	I'd rather be snowboarding If you're an avid snowboarder, you'll probably agree with this statement--especially when you're stuck at work or school: "I'd rather be snowboarding."
I'd rather be skateboarding When you're at school or work, do you ever think to yourself, "I'd rather be skateboarding!"? Let others know that whatever it is you're doing right now, you'd really prefer to be skateboarding!	I'd rather be bowling! Are you an avid bowler? Whatever your skill level, if bowling is your passion you've probably felt like saying this before: I'd rather be bowling! Now you can say it any time & place.	I'd rather be bowling! If you're an avid bowler, you might like to wear or display this bowling design. Let others know that whatever it is you're doing right now, "I'd rather be bowling!"	I'd rather be sailing Do you frequently find yourself daydreaming about sailing? Perhaps when you're at work, your mind drifts off to the great times you've spent on the water. Speak up! "I'd rather be sailing"
I'd rather be golfing Are you an avid golfer who prefers to be on the links than just about anywhere else? If so, this may be perfect for you, or as a great gift for the golf enthusiast in your life: "I'd rather be golfing	I've got balls! If you're a golfer, you can have a little fun with this play on words, on or off the golf course. Other golfers may want one, too!: "I've got balls!"	Eat. Sleep. Golf. This design is perfect for those who live to golf. It says quite simply: "Eat. Sleep. Golf." If you're an avid golfer, or perhaps have someone in your life who is, this makes a great gift any time.	Eat. Sleep. Knit. This design is perfect for those who live to knit. It says quite simply: "Eat. Sleep. Knit." (But, really, what else is there?! Let's not mention jobs, housework, and other mundane stuff!)
Eat. Sleep. Crochet. This design is perfect for those who live to crochet. It says quite simply: "Eat. Sleep. Crochet." (But, really, what else is there?! Let's not mention jobs, housework, and other mundane stuff!)	If you must smoke, please don't exhale For the smokers of the world who don't get that others don't want to breathe their toxic fumes, suggest this to them: "If you must smoke, please don't exhale."	Smokers stink Is there anything as disgusting as the smell of old tobacco on smokers, their clothes, their hair, their...everything?! You can express your anti-smoking feelings with this: "Smokers stink"	Smoking is a choice. Breathing isn't. Some smokers think it's their right to pollute YOUR air with their smoke. Tell them: "Smoking is a choice. Breathing isn't" with this anti-smoking design.
Suicide sucks...for those left behind Has your life been torn apart by the suicide of a loved one? We know that nothing can undo the pain, but you can express your feelings with this anti-suicide message.	When someone you treasure... Remember the loved one you've lost and are mourning with this poignant design: When someone you treasure becomes a memory, the memory becomes a treasure.	Serenity With today's hectic, nonstop lifestyle, there's never been a better time to stop and reflect on things that are truly important. This one word message, Serenity, can help keep things in check.	Aging baby boomer If you're of a certain age, like we are!, you're part of a very special group of people: Baby boomers. And you're, well, aging! So go ahead and say it: "Aging baby boomer"
One man, two doctorate degrees Are you an overachiever, not satisfied with just ONE postgraduate degree? Have some fun with this higher-education design: One man, two doctorate degrees. Great for folks with MD/PhD/DDS/DVM/DMD etc.	Yin yang (black/white) Yin yang symbol in black and white.	Yin yang (rainbow) Yin yang symbol in rainbow colors and white.	Practice safe sex: Go screw yourself! Ever feel like telling people off--and getting a message across at the same time? Well...here you go. "Practice safe sex: Go screw yourself!"
You're right, they're fake (you can look up now) If you've had a boob job and are sick of questioning stares, or just proud of your fake breasts, say it with this. "You're right. They're fake. (You can look up now)"	California native If you're as proud as I am to be a California native, why not flaunt it?! This is especially nice if you're [unfortunately!] living out-of-state.